“Really?” I asked, raising my eyebrows.
“Does that make you sad? I mean, that’s A LOT of months! You’re getting older.”
“Um, no, it doesn’t make me sad. I’ve been so lucky to live so long. I fully expect to see 500 months or even 800 months. Since I’m going to live so long, 420 months is nothing. Bring it!”
There was a time when I would shudder at the thought of being 35. I mean, every day I live, I’m closer to 40 than 30. How is that possible when I still feel 20 or at least 20+15???
Before I could go off on my “I’m thankful for a long life, and everyday is a gift” speech, he turned to me, very seriously and asked, “What was the best day of your life?” His face was very serious and I knew he really wanted to know.
“Um, I don’t know what the BEST day of my life was. I mean, I’ve had lots of good days, great days, in fact, and so many days I wish I could live again. I don’t know what the BEST day was,” I told him honestly.
What I didn’t tell my 8-year-old son, was that his question made my heart stop and stomach flop to the floor. What was the best day of my life? I really don’t know, but what his question made me realize, that whatever the best day of my life was, at the age of 35, I have already lived it.
Now, it’s easy for everyone else to say, “You don’t know that you have lived your BEST day yet.” True, however, I’m sure I have.
We had six years together as a complete family. We had six years of love, laughter, tears, anger, and just plain life. We went on trips, to ballgames, museums, walks, and had many adventures. Together. All FOUR of us. For 13 years I felt the deepest, unconditional love I will ever feel. My husband would have given his life for mine, AND our kids. No one will love the three of us like that again.
Now, instead of four, we are three. There will never be a day in my life that was better than when it was FOUR. (But, I’m sure there will be MANY good days ahead.)
But the BEST day? I already lived that, even if I didn’t know it. As a person who loves to live in the moment, if I had one wish, it would be to live every minute of our thirteen years together all over again.