I still can’t believe it. I can’t believe I am back in the world of papers, assignments, and classes. I ordered my first two books, and I am waiting for their arrival. I have two pages of assignments to get done before my first class in September. I missed the group’s first class in August, but I had a REALLY good excuse: I didn’t even know this grad school program existed. Now I know. In less than three week’s time, I heard about the program, applied, asked for references, did research, wrote a paper, found financial aid, and now I am a college student AGAIN. It would have been nice to know about this program a few months ago, we could have prepared for it, but I am starting to realize that God doesn’t work that way. When things are right and supposed to happen, it happens really fast!
I am scared about being back in college. I am scared that I am not smart enough, or I have changed too much. I am scared because I don’t have my own classroom and that could make this program more difficult. I am scared that I will not do well. However, I know I will work hard. I know I will finish and I know that someday getting a master’s degree will open doors for me. It’s keeping us in Nebraska for two more years, and then after that we will see. If I can’t get a job here at that time, we will have an excuse to find a place that will give me a job.
Anyway, although I am a tad overwhelmed and still in disbelief, I am excited to finally be able to do something about my future. I might not be in control of when or where I work each day, but at least I know I am trying. The best thing about trying is eventually you succeed.